Doggystyle

'Your next musical choice is, 'How Much is that Doggie in the Window?'" says Myles Dungan in disbelief. "It's not one that I necessarily thought that anybody would choose." Particularly not when that person is allegedly "the most cunning, the most devious of them all", according to former Taoiseach Charles Haughey.

Bertie Ahern's Christmas offensive was upped by his much talked about, feature-length interview on RTÉ's arts programme, Rattlebag. At times ridiculous (as above), at times mildly amusing (when he spoke about his vested interest in liking Westlife) and sometimes authentic-sounding (his sporting obsession seems disturbingly genuine), it was a pleasant break from hearing Bertie muddling his way through issues like the Northern Bank robbery, Ivor Callely's suitability for a junior ministerial role and the evils of Sinn Féin's economic policies. It was good radio and elevated Rattlebag from a fairly pedestrian, inanimate arts chat to a programme that made the front pages of every national broadsheet newspaper in the country. (Granted, there was virtually nothing else happening that day, or any other day since Christmas: see Meejit, page 33.)

"It's the first song that I can remember," said Bertie of 'How Much is that Doggie in the Window?' "My mother used to sing it to me. I can literally remember being plonked on her knee and her trying to cajole me to eat, trying to sing me that song." He estimates he was three years of age.

Myles Dungan did well. It was never going to be hard-hitting, there was never going to be any heated debate – there rarely is on Rattlebag – but that wasn't the point. The point was to let Bertie waffle on and do the entertaining, and that's what he tried to do, without being entirely successful.

There were insights into how the young Bertie loved 1960s pop. "Thursday night you were checking out to see what was the top ten that week, and Sunday night listening to... Luxembourg – 257, was it? – listen to Pop Call on a Wednesday night on RTÉ, and following all the programmes. In my school, there was a divide between the Beatles fans and the Stones fans..."

He made a good, not particularly obvious choice for his favourite 60s tune: 'Whiter Shade of Pale' by Procul Harum (did he pick it or did one of his advisors?). His daughters force him to listen to modern music: "Other than my daughters making me also like 1990s music, and this decade's music, I probably wouldn't have an idea."

The part about sport dragged on a bit. One of Bertie's favourite books is The History of Dublin GAA 1884 – 2004 by William Nolan. He discussed at length the role of gaelic football to Dublin society, how GAA now has to compete with other forms of entertainment, the decline of the Dublin camogie team. It was esoteric kind of material, and most people will probably have drifted off, but he clearly knew what he was talking about.

Last week's radio column featured a review of a previous edition of Rattlebag. It was billed as a "special show" by presenter Myles Dungan, but it turned out to be a total letdown because of its unspectacular lineup (trad veterans Altan, classical pianist Finian Collins, musician Noel Hill, two poets and singing turd, Jack L). The Bertie interview was also billed as a special occasion, and unlike the previous occasion, that's what it was. It's a pity that it was the calibre of guest, and not any special input from the show's makers, that made it so.

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